FUSE Urban LGBTQIA+ Retreat and the importance of queer embodiment

The topic of embodiment and supporting queer embodiment is a big one for me; personally and in my work as an embodiment coach and yoga therapist. That’s why I was thrilled when someone reached out to me to see if I wanted to facilitate a session at their upcoming retreat 16-17 October, 2021 for LGBTQIA+ people focused on embodiment. 

Today, Simon and Sasha, the creators of the event have taken some time to share more about it and their thoughts on the importance of queer embodiment, play and intimacy as an LGBTQIA+ person.

Fuse Retreat Website

Hi Sasha and Simon! Thanks for taking the time to talk with me today!

We got in touch with each other when you were looking for queer embodiment facilitators for something that sounded pretty awesome… a retreat called Fuse in Amsterdam for LGBTQIA+ people. 

So… to start can you tell us a little about Fuse?

Sasha: Fuse is a first-of-its-kind urban retreat created specifically for the LGBTQ+ community. It’s 2 days of novel workshops about play, movement and authentic relating. That’s it in a nutshell. 

More important than what for us is Why Fuse?

It's a question that we spent a lot of time thinking about. Specifically, what we could offer our community at this time in history to help us get in touch with something altogether deeper. More real. And more interesting. Like getting out of our heads and back into our bodies. Like a felt sense of community, and the experience of connection that we all need. Possibly even crave, if the last 18 months are anything to go by.

It's so easy to get lost in endless thumb scrolls, inbox overload and 'connecting' with people online without really connecting at all.

So we dreamed up an experiential container to help bring us back in touch with the moment, with aliveness and the power of our own resources as a way to heal, and engage “differently” as we create the shared future we all want to be part of.

I really relate to this desire and need for connection. I love that technology can connect us and at the same time, it can pull us away from our bodies and from actually physically connecting with other humans. It’s so easy to get disconnected from ourselves, from our bodies and from community - both local and global. I see it in myself and in my clients.

So you said that this is for the LGBTQ+ community. Can you tell me more?

Sasha: This event is for anyone from the LGBTQ+ community who has an interest in getting to know themselves from a wholly new perspective - first timers who are new to the work we call embodiment and somatics, and it’s also for those with more experience in this world who’d like to expand their practice. Each of the facilitators in our carefully curated program will offer us a way to tap into some of the deeper aspects of ourselves, our ways of being in the world, in such a way that we’ll walk away with a renewed and hopefully more confident sense of self, belonging and community.

For me a big part of embodiment is learning to return to our physical sensory experience in a kind and compassionate way. To begin living from our bodymind rather than living in the head and thinking about the body. What’s embodiment to you?

Simon: So often we live from our heads more than our bodies, and use our bodies as a way of getting from A to B. But when I’m scared I feel it in my body; when I’m excited I feel it in my body first; my head then starts to interpret it. So it’s about starting with the body, here and now, with what’s really present and outside of my stories. 

That resonates for me. How do you see queer embodiment as perhaps especially relevant for those of us in LGBTQ+ communities?

Simon: A lot of LGBTQ people have spent a lot of time monitoring their bodies, how we present ourselves, how we connect to each other - and to ourselves, if you think about the trans narrative of being in the ‘wrong body.’ A lot of where we come from is the body so it feels like a good place to begin. Play or creativity start with the body too, less than thinking. This is why nature is often where inspiration comes from; when the body is settled, the flow can inspire new ideas to well up effortlessly, whether that’s creativity, play or deeper connection

I definitely relate to the experience of monitoring - both monitoring my own body and being aware of being monitored by others. That feels so fundamentally different from experiencing the body. This word PLAY really sits with me. I notice it’s a big theme in the event. What feels especially important or relevant about play, movement and authentic relating?

Simon: So often as teenagers we shut down our need for play. Play gives us space to try out ways of being in the world; animals and children play - we’re testing ways to be. We have a lot of judgement on that as adults which create a contraction around who we can be. We know that creativity is the basis of everything; conversations, changing the world, how we deal with ourselves. Without play, it’s not possible. The essence of how we are through the world is our bodies - we move through space - we have autonomous movement. But we restrict it, and our bodies become patterned in the same way that our minds do. Authentic relating helps us bring ourselves more fully to situations and in a way that acknowledges what's truly alive for us in a given moment. So often we hide our need for approval or that we’re uncomfortable with another person; we hide this to protect ourselves and others. I can’t control what anyone else is doing, but authentic relating helps me take responsibility for our place and views of the world

When we talked before, you mentioned that you intend to open space for exploring intimacy, the body and connection with others while not being a “sexual space”. What feels important to you about making this distinction?

Sasha: there are so many events out there designed for people to explore their sexuality, and especially those catering to gay or queer audiences, where sexuality seems to be the only thing you can explore. 

Our community is even defined largely in terms of our sexuality, and historically that’s been the case too. So it felt like it was time for something new, a different approach. And what could that be like? We wanted to create a space that would allow people to start from a place of community, get in touch with their playful sides, learn how to tap into the wisdom of the body more through movement, and bring more of themselves to life by simply being more authentic. And of course, once you’re grounded in those aspects, things like sexuality become all the more fun. 

So it’s not a rejection of sexuality but a chance to connect to your core and explore other aspects of intimacy, connection and authenticity? This reminds me of something you said on the website… You describe Fuse as an opportunity for exploring deeper connection with yourself and others and exploring your ‘yes’ at the centre of it all.

Simon: Yes, it’s about being in connection with what I want and who I really am; in connection with other people who can support my journey, and that want the journey to who I am to be authentic rather than a mask I need to wear in order to be accepted for these aspects of myself. 

It’s about creating reference points in our body systems and emotional systems, and to meet other people and facilitators who are interested in the same things. It’s about deepening into our experience of this.

Sasha: There are so many ways we’re pulled away from our ‘yes’ in daily life that it’s easy to lose sight of it. I spent years without really knowing what my personal ‘yes’ really meant, or even felt like, so it’s been a journey to come into that knowing in a truly embodied sense. I believe that if more of us learn that for ourselves, and let our ‘yes’  become a guiding principle at all times, we’d be living on a very different planet. In fact, I’d even go so far as to say that deeper embodiment could help us transition through some of the incredible, multiple and converging challenges we’re currently facing as a civilisation. It’s that big, and could start with something as small as a weekend workshop in Amsterdam.  

I can’t wait to experience it myself when I’m not the one facilitating! It’s such a gift to have so many talented facilitators grounded in embodiment and somatic practices who will be present! 

It all makes me curious though… How are you going to navigate safety? When inviting people - especially queer, trans and BIPOC people into communal spaces exploring embodiment, there is always a degree of risk and potential triggering which can be experienced. Personally, I resonate with Arao & Clemens’ description of brave spaces, in which everyone is treated with respect, people are given agency over the degree of challenge they want to engage in, and where intentions and impacts are owned (see footnote.

Can you say more about how you have and intend to ensure that GetFused is a safe or brave space for those who attend?

Simon: We’ll definitely be talking at the beginning about how Fuse will be a brave space, not a safe space. That’s exactly the language we’ll be using. First, we’ll have designated support allies in case people need them. They’re there if people need emotional support and so on. Everyone will also be put into a pod of 3-5 people, and participants will tune into that group twice a day. Throughout the retreat, there will be people who know where you’re at in your process. There will be someone who knows me just for my process, what people need and what support too. The retreat aims to be a supportive space, and people are encouraged to take responsibility for themselves - What do I need? What do I want? What does self-leadership look like for me in this space? One of the hardest things we can do as humans is ask for help. This retreat will ask you to step outside of yourself in a gentle way.

Simon, Sasha… I really appreciate you taking the time to share all this with us. 

I’ll bet there’s some people reading who are interested and want to know if it’s too late to sign up! Is there still space?

Sasha: As of today, there are still places left, yes, and we’ve also included a limited number of concession and community tickets available for people in need; simply contact us. We do know of a couple of people travelling from further afield, but expect attendance to be very local this time round. We’re starting slow and organic; a more intimate experience for our first edition.

And do participants need any experience or is there anything else that would help someone prepare for this?

Sasha: No previous experience of anything is necessary to attend. If anything, experience at life! The workshops of our facilitators are all entirely relatable no matter who you are, and will help anyone get to know themselves in a different way, and that’s exciting. In terms of preparedness, I’d say leave all expectations at the door. Come curious, come open to possibilities. Easier said than done of course, but that’s also the crux of the work - letting go of our stories, becoming innocent again to the magic that life can bring...if only we let it. And also; are you ready for that experience of aliveness and spontaneity?

Are you ready for the experience of aliveness? I got chills when I saw that question. There’s so much that can get in the way of actually experiencing our aliveness. In my own work, I often think of it as being a lot about discovering the ability to and power of befriending our experience, our body and our self. 

Both, Thank you so much for your time! I’m really excited to be a part of this event both as a facilitator and a participant! And I can’t wait to hear the stories from participants in the event!

Sasha: Thank you! I really hope it will be the start of something magical for many participants. Whether that’s discovering something about themselves they didn’t know before, making new friends, or opening up to greater and wider possibilities for them in life experience.

And we are so curious to see how this evolves with the needs of our community! Sometimes we dream about Fuse satellite projects! We’ll see. We’ve planted the seed; we’re unleashing a beast, and there’s no telling right now which way it will run. 

Want to see the list of sessions, facilitators or sign up for Fuse? Go check out https://www.fuseurbanretreat.com/

About Simon and Sasha

Simon Magnus is a movement and play practitioner who specialises in working with groups to get individuals to connect more deeply with their bodies and their own emotional realities.

He has worked creating transformational arts events in the UK for the past 15 years and since 2016 has been training in somatic trauma work. He has worked around the world to help people connect to the intimacy in themselves and with others. His work has taken him into diverse groups of people, from children to those living with acute mental health issues, clowns to people in full suits and ties. He emphasises the creation of a brave space where risk can be taken by participants within their own boundaries and choice.

Sasha Naod has a background in journalism, communications and storytelling. Over the course of his career, he has become interested in the stories we tell ourselves; the narratives we construct about our experiences and reality. In particular, what happens when we become aware of those stories, and become a conscious script writer of the best story we’ve ever told - and lived! It’s been said that everyone has a book in them, but have you thought about being the star in your own movie? Clue: it’s more accessible than you think, according to Sasha, who is exploring how heart, mind and body come together to shed light on what’s often right in front of us. 

Footnote:

• Brian Arao and Kristi Clemens (2013) “From Safe Spaces to Brave Spaces”, The Art of Effective Facilitation: Reflections From Social Justice Educators